Skeezix's Scratching Post: May 2009

Post Spellin Bee Deepreshun

I have bin so deeprest over loozing the Nashunul Spellin Bee over a fashun fo paw that I've bin hiding owt all weekend, drinking muther's milk, and staying in bed. I deesided to burrow under my heet pad so that the brite lite won't hert my eyes, and I can hide owt frum the werld.

BTW, the FL takes the thret of prizzin seeriussly and won't clip any tags off anything. Wich is good cuz if she got cawt, it wood be just like her to blame Mr TF, and then he'd go to prizzin, and I'd be left withowt a face to lik.

Labels: national spelling bee

Wile I'm recuvering frum my devastating loss....

....Check owt The Cat's Meow. Today I'm feechering a video of me and my best frend Finn going strollin together! Yoo can see me stroll topless! That's me and Finn's mom on the rite.

Also, my FL rote a good stroller buying gide that inkloods a speshul 10% off coopon fur a stroler purchase.

Thare's also sum good cheezburger thare today!

Now, bak to my muther's milk....

Labels: The Cats Meow

Good News, Bad News

For thoze of yoo hoo tooned in to teevee tonite to watch the finuls of the Nashunul Spellin Bee, yoo mite have notist I wuzn't in it. This is the BAD NEWS part of this post. Vary bad news.

Yoo see, win I wuz seeted with the other finulists for the finul rownd, thare was a pawz, and I saw the judges conferring with each other fur sevrul minits: Then they asked me to stand up. I thot maybe they were gonna give me the big trofeey rite then and thare and spare my opponints the hyoomiliation of loozing to me.

But I was rong. So vary rong.

The fakt is, they didn't like my kyoot pinkalicious owtfit. They told me that akording to the rules, I had to ware the stoopid ugly wite Spellin Bee polo shirt in the finuls, not my kyoot pinkalicious owtfit. And they also sed it wuz illegal to ware a kyoot owtfit that had riting on it like P-I-N-K-A-L-I-C-I-O-U-S in case pinkalicious it was one of the werds in the contest. And then they had two big berly sekyerity men drag me off the stage. It was H-Y-O-O-M-I-L-I-A-T-I-N. I think my face leeked a littul. Or maybe a lot.

I know whut yer thinkin. Can thare possibly be any good news in this?

Well, thare is, sorta. After they awarded the grand prize trofeey at the end of the bee to Kavya Shivashankar, they gave a speshul award to me, as voted on by all the kids in the contest. I got the Miss Congeniality award wich is the prize they give to loozers. Yoo know, I can't even look Jeter Harris and Antie Bee in the eyes, I am so I-M-B-E-R-R-I-S-T. But the sash is kinda kyoot. And da grate Jacques Bailey and Jill Biden shook my hand. That was sum consolayshun.

Heer I am after I got my Miss Congeniality award and my frend Sid is behind me cheering.

I think it is time to drink lots of muther's milk and try to figyer owt if being a purrfeshunl speller is reely such a good career path fur me. Jeter, are yoo buyin? Antie Bee looks like she needs a big slice of cake.

Labels: national spelling bee

At da Bee with Antie Bee!

Well, wile I'm waiting fur the finals to start, I thot I'd show yoo a pikcher of part of the audiense, inklooding ware Antie Bee and my spellin coach da grate Jeter Harris are sitting. It's serkled in pink. Yoo can just barely make owt Antie Bee's tiara and Jete's blue Yankee cap. Up on the stage, I'm in the frunt row. I like the frunt row cuz I can see better, altho yoo can't reely chat with the other cumpetiters win yer rite in frunt. I like chatting with evrybuddy cuz thare reel intristing kids. I ask them qweschuns like, "How many yeers did yoo have to sit owt in the frunt yard beefore the short bus pikt yoo up and took yoo to skool?" Yoo won't beeleeve it, but not a singul one of theeze kids has ever got to ride the short bus!!!! I think maybe the short bus diskriminates aginst good spellers. Whut do yoo think?

Be shur to toon in tonite to see me in the finuls on nashunul teevee!

Labels: Antie Bee, I'm glad I have Jeter Harris as my spelling coach, national spelling bee

First Round

Over the weekend, me and the Food Lady watched a House marruthon. And it gave me an idea. Sinse they ask a lot of medikul werds at the Nashunul Spellin Bee, I asked her to help me spell evry dizeeze that was menshuned on House, MD. Theeze are the werds we added to my spellin list:

Fibrosis
Toxoplasmosis (the litter box dizeeze)
Sarcoidosis (as yoo can planely see, lots of dizeezes end in "osis." The ones that don't end in "osis" end in"itis")
Dermatitis
Encephalitis (Jeter Harris told me if I heer a werd with the "F" sownd, to spell it "PH")
Lupus (wich shood be speld "L-O-O-P-U-S" dontcha think?)
MS (that's an eezy one)
Hemorrhoids (why is this not speld H-E-M-R-O-I-D-S? Jeter Harris told me not to werry abowt it cuz da grate Jacques Bailey wood be too imberrist to say hemroids out lowd on nashunul teevee, so it will probly never git asked as a spellin werd.)

It was a good strategy, as yoo will soon discuver.

This morning win I took the stage, I was a little nerviss, but I didn't have brekfist so I didn't werry abowt wetting my pants or getting the sqwerts. The speller in frunt of me was a nice gerl named Ramya Auroprem frum San Hozay, wich is ware Jeter's best frend Reebok livs. She pet me soft and sed I was pritty. I asked her if she new Reebok, but she sed he duzn't go to her skool. Ramya got a hard werd: hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia. It was not only hard, but it was long, too. It's eezy to looze yer place spellin a long werd like that. And then I realized that if she didn't spell it rite, I wood have to spell it, and at that point I just had to shut my eyes tite and say over and over to myself, "Don't krap yer pants, don't krap yer pants, don't krap yer pants." Cuz even tho I didn't eet brekfist, I was feelin' kinda warm down thare.

Forchewnitly Ramya spelt it rite. I don't know how she did it. I never rooted so hard fur one of my opponents in my life. And then it was time for me to stand up and walk to the microphone. I saw my spellin coach Jeter Harris in the crowd, and he gave me a big paws up. I took a deep breth.

And win da grate Jacques Bailey sed the werd, I almost sqweeled, cuz it was a werd I knew: S-A-R-C-O-I-D-O-S-I-S!!!! I coodn't beeleeve my good forchun!!!! Sarcoidosis is menchuned in neerly evry episode of House, so I got lots of practiss spellin it! I took a deep breth, looked Jacques Bailey rite in the eyes, and speld it purrfectly!

WOOO HOOO! On to the next round!!!!

Labels: da grate Jeter Harris, jacques bailey, national spelling bee, sarcoidosis

Last Minit Studying

I think I'm reddy fur the Nashunul Spellin Bee. Heer are sum fotos frum my last minit prepurrations yesterday.

Ferst, most importuntly, I pikt owt the kyoot owtfit I wunt to ware in the finals. As yoo can planely see, it's PINKALICIOUS. That's speld P-I-N-K-A-L-I-C-I-O-U-S. Yoo can biggify it to see all the nice klassy deetales. Not only is it pink, but it's got bling, ruffles, pom poms, a bow, a peese sine and a skull and krossbones. My spellin coach da grate Jeter Harris rekummended the skull and crossbones to intimidate my opponents.

I red a few pages of the dikshunery fur last minit kramming. Kramming is win yoo kram so much knowlidge into yer branes yoo think yer hed is gonna explode.

Evry once in a wile, I took a brake to get in a reely good skratch. Taking brakes is importunt cuz it gives yer branes a chanse to relax after having so much knowlidge krammed into them, and it also gives my spellin coach da grate Jeter Harris an oppertoonity to ketch up on the Yankees' skore.

As I krammed, I kept me reeding glasses handy in case I needed them. My spellin coach da grate Jeter Harris sed I shood ware them in frunt of my opponents cuz it will make me look smart and intimidate them. Jeter Harris is all abowt intimidayshun. Just like win da grate Fill Hyooz stares down a batter with the evil I.

After all that last minit kramming, it was time to pak up and go. So I wint. Wish me luk!

Labels: I'm glad I have Jeter Harris as my spelling coach, national spelling bee, pinkalicious

Wordless Wednesday

Labels: boy it's nice to have Mr TF back, wordless wednesday

Call me Mr Poopy!

Mr TF was gone this weekend. He wint to Sandy Eggo. Win he got bak I klimed in his lap to give his face a good likkin', but he wint "EEEEUUUUWWWWW!" I had poopsplat on my noze. It's always sumthing, isn't it?

Labels: Mr Poopy, the sqwerts

A Brake frum the G-R-I-N-D-S-T-O-N-E

I have bin berried in werds this weekend as I have bin doing my last minit kramming fur the Nashunul Spellin' Bee. I've watched many videos of da grate Jacques Bailey purrnouncing werds, and I've bin drinking lots of muther's milk to relax so I'm not so nerviss.

So I haven't bin blogging much.

But I did wunt to call attenshun to a reesint honor I had. I was feecherd on the Martha Stewart Pets site, ware they shode the 17 best kyoot Spring owtfits frum thare Easter contest. I was hartbroken that I didn't win the contest, but at leest my kyoot owtfit got the rekugnishun it dezerved (If yoo klik the pikcher yoo can biggify to see it better):

Well, I'm kinda a nerviss reck over the Spellin' Bee, so I'm gonna drink a few pints of Muther's Milk and see if I can git sum byooty sleep!

Labels: I'm glad I have Jeter Harris as my spelling coach, mother's milk, national spelling bee

Happy Berthday, ML!!!!!

Thursday 13: 13 Grate Things Goin' on at The Cat's Meow

We've had a reely grate week at The Cat's Meow. Heer are 13 things yoo shood chek owt:

Info on the Nutro Cat Food Recall.
Larry the Cat was missing, but now she's back on the job at Michigan Coatings.
6 grate contests and giveaways.
Kittens plucked frum the jaws of a recycling crusher.
Catster Millie: an Animal Cops success story.
Biggest star of the Cannes Film Festival: Midge the Cat!
Monday Movie: Parrot pets cat
Pet-safe gardening tips from the ASPCA
Jack the Cat back home after 10-month walkabout
Interview with Taz on his 20th berthday
Saving the Jesusita Fire Cats
Friday Cheezburger
Grumpy Cat found 150 miles from home, thanks to microchip

Labels: The Cats Meow

Farewell, Georgia

I can hardly tipe cuz my face is leeking so hard. Chey's sister Georgia has gone to the Bridge. Thare wuz a vary nice foto of her on Chey's blog this week, sitting with Gemini, and that's how I will remember her.

Georgia, we will all miss yoo.

XXXOOO
Skeezy, Mao, Rocky and Trip

Labels: chey, georgia, rainbow bridge

Wordless Wednesday

Labels: cat in the clover

If you don't have Mao & Rocky's Vishus Deer Repelunt....

My best frend Snuzzy left a note in the comments of my most reesint vishus deer post sugjesting that I take a look at how HE delt with the vishus deer menniss win he lived in Sweden. Jeter, yer mom wood reely like to watch this, cuz Snuzzy is NOT waring a shert in this moovey: Chek it out here.

Labels: mao and rocky's vishus deer repelunt, snuzzy

Tuesday 'Toon

Labels: at least he gets to go to school, new yorker cartoons

Yesterday's Advencher

Yesterday was one of the BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE!!! I got to go strolling, but we didn't strole in my nayberhood by Mr Tinydik's howse, we wint to a place called Berkly ware my Catster frend Finn lives! I got to know Finn after he winned a sellebrity foto shoot with Mark Rogers. Finn has got the modeling thing DOWN! And then I got to go strolling with Finn in his nayberhood! Wow, yoo talk abowt ixsiting!!!!

That's me and Finn in the pikcher above. I'm the one in the red Jeep Rubicon stroler. Unforchewnitly, we had a little problim with the zipper on my stroler, but it was all good cuz I got to tern it into a convertibul and ride with the top down! That was vary vary grate. Cuz it was hot and I cood feel the wind on my furs. Thare's nuthin like ridin in a red convertibul on a warm spring day!

Now git this: I GOT TO GO ROK KLIMING during my strole!!! This is called free kliming. I didn't have anywun to belay me, I just klimed rite up to the top of this massive rok mowntin! Well, the Food Lady did hold my harniss, but it was still like free kliming. Rok kliming is a VARY MANLY THING TO DO. And I didn't even need to put chok on my fingers, I was just that good!

Sinse I wuz strollin with Finn fur a feecher story abowt Strollin on The Cat's Meow, I demunstrated how spayshun and roomy my stroler is: a cuppul of cats cood ride in the cargo hold underneeth! And as yoo can planely see, thare's plenty of hed room!

It was a vary cat-frendly nayberhood, as yoo can see frum this howse that had cat art in frunt!

But suddenly, a strole that started out so fun, ternd terribly rong, win this happend:

Labels: Cat's Meow Blog, finn, jeep rubicon pet stroler, strolling

Happy Berthday, Mr TF!

Yesterday was Mr TF's berthday. He got a lot of grate prezzies like a yodeling pikkle frum the Food Lady. Winever Tripper heers the yodeling pikkle, he comes running. Not me. Yodeling kinda scares me. So yesterday was all abowt Mr TF, but the FL made it up to me today and took me on a grate advencher.... I'll have pikchers tomorrow!

Labels: da grate Mr TF, never give up never surrender, Yodeling Pickle

Free Stuff and Great Deals!

Here are just a few of the great coupons and deals this week on the Pet Coupons & Deals blog:

Win a 1-Year supply of The World's Best Cat Litter
Save $76 on the Hepper Podium Bed
FREE Cat Grass Seeds
FREE Feliway Wipes and $10-off Feliway Diffuser
FREE book: How to Pamper Your Cat
15% Off your order at Entirely Pets
Win a $100 Petco Gift Card
Friskies Giveaway: Dry cat food and bowls
FREE Breeder's Choice Cat Food

Check out all the freebies at the Pet Coupons & Deals Blog.

Check out all cat deals and coupons at the Pet Coupons & Deals Blog.

Labels: frugal feline

Happy Berthday Taz and Toulouse!

A cuppul of my closest frends are sellubrating berthdays today: Toulouse and Taz. Taz is 20!!!! That's older than Rocky, and Rocky's the oldest geezer I know! I interviewed Taz fur The Cat's Meow, so be shur to reed the interview cuz he reeveels his seekrit for longevity as well as letting us know ware he gits all his kyoot clothes!

Hed on over to The Cat's Meow to chek 'em out!

Labels: happy birthday, taz, toulouse

Frootbat Friday

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

I think I fownd my long-lost ginger cuzzin!!!

Labels: frootbat friday

Tryin to Chillax

Studying fur the Nashunul Spellin Bee is vary stressfull, espeshully becuz I kinda have a little bit of a nerviss dispozishun. My spellin coach, da grate Jeter Harris sed I shood set aside sum time each day to chillax, maybe by lissening to sum nice myoozik.

So I tride that. Heer, me and Mr TF are lissening to sum violin myoozik. Violin myoozik duz not help me chillax, tho, cuz it sownds like cats bein torcherd. But I did give it a try. Maybe sum nice oboes wood be better to lissen to. Anybuddy got sum sugjeschuns?

Labels: I'm glad I have Jeter Harris as my spelling coach

Wordless Wednesday

Labels: wordless wednesday

Time for a little ear high-jeen

Labels: vanes in my ears

Anuther chanse to bid!

If any of yoo mist owt gitting on this grate Feline Fashionista owtfit becuz my best frend Shabby bid $200 for it to help out the Tennessee cats, yoo have anuther chanse.

I have donayted anuther one to an auction that's being held to help my Catster frend Aldo. Aldo was rescued by Catsters last yeer win his mom dide unexpektedly and his mom's bruther then just ternd the cats owt of the howse to fend fur themselfs. Catster Hazel Lucy fownd owt and mobilized a Catster army to trap the cats and git thare dawg bruther owt of the pownd. Then they transported them frum Florida to new homes -- one in New Meksiko, and one in Baltymore. Yoo can reed the hole story heer.

Well, Aldo -- the cat hoo wint to Baltymore -- almost lived happily ever after. Until reesintly, win his mom lost her job and he got sik of a misteeriuss illness and his mom only has enuf munneys fur one more mortgage payment. So we're razing munneys to make shur that Aldo can git the medikul care he needs, and has enuf foods to eet.

Heer is a foto of my best frend Shabby waring his kyoot owtfit:

Woodn't yoo like to look as hansum as Shabby??? They shood change his name frum Shabby to Dapper!!!

I'll will custum-make an owtfit if yoo are skinny or a plus-sized cat. The current bid is only $5. So put in a bid now! Priority shipping within the U.S. in inklooded, and I will ship parsel post owtside the U.S.

Labels: auction, feline fashionista

Last Nite's Walk

Finely, owr stormy gloomy kold wether is gone, and to sellubrate, I got to go on a walk last nite in the bak yard.

Mr TF was kinda tired, so he let Tripper walk me part of the way. I don't think I like Trip walking me becuz one of theeze days he's gonna walk me to lunch, and gess hoo is gonna be the ontray?

Mr TF cood tell I was a little bit nerviss, so he took over. This is not a vary intristing shot, but I told Mr TF we needed to git a shot of his blindingly pasty wite legs fur Jeter Harris cuz Jete likes the Mr TF shorts shots. Heer ya go, Jete:

Hope yoo all are enjoying the nice wether!

Labels: jeter harris, Mr TF's wite legs, tripper the psyko stray cat

Why is she shopping fur PEEPS?

As yoo all know, I love PEEPS, probly becuz I think they are moduled after me. Today, insted of taking me strolling, the FL is off looking fur easter-leftover PEEPS to buy after she saw this at CNN online. She promised she wood make one that looks just like me in a kaptan's unyform. I sed, run that unyform thru the wash a few times until it terns PINK!

Labels: peeps, star trek, STTOS

I'm not Smilin over the Smile2 Contest Roolz

Over at The Cat's Meow, we just helped purrmote the new Smile2 Video/Foto contest. It's a contest fur da best smilin pet foto. Well, I've got a GRATE smilin foto, but gess whut? THEY WON'T LET CATS WITH SUNGLASSES OR KYOOT OWTFITS INTO THE CONTEST!!! !!!! !!!!! It is a contest fur noodists. I have never run into that prejoodiss beefore. Hoo ever herd of a contest fur pet noodists??? Not me!

I am defintly not laffin an laffin over this one.

Labels: I will never go nood just to win a contest

Taking the Day Off....

Klik to biggify:

I'm gonna take today off frum the blogosfeer and hed fur the stratosfeer.

Dang. Ware's my fazer?

Labels: STTOS

Wordless Wenzday

Labels: doin the meatloaf, wordless wednesday

Happy Sinko day My-O!

Happy Sinko day My-O Evrywun! Yoo can klik the pikcher to send a free ecard!

Labels: cinco de mayo

CONTEST: Best Cat Mom!

Hey, evrybuddy, wile I'm trying to pull myself owt of this funk fur not having bin krowned Mr Castro Valley, I'm hosting a contest at The Cat's Meow fur the Best Cat Mom.

PRIZES: 50 zealies, a Catster T-shirt and a pink Skeezy cap.

Click here fur deetales!

Labels: catster, The Cats Meow

Welcome to the Werst Day of My Life

Do yoo notiss anything rong with this pikcher?

That's rite, I'm not in it.

I was hartbroken to see that they holded a Mr Castro Valley contest, and not only did I not win, but I WUZN'T EVEN INVITED TO ENTER!!!! After all I've dun to put Castro Valley on the map! Whut's up with that? Are the contest orginizers BRANE DED???

As if to add insult to injury, the newly crownd Mr Castro Valley gits to ware a kyoot pink cape AND a tiara. And I git to ware..... nuthin'.

I'm sitting heer krying my eyes owt.

Labels: mr castro valley, this is the werst day of my life